Dead Man's Party
Waiting for an invitation to arrive
This is for my Substack friend Violet who was traumatized by haunted houses as a young woman.
My husband and I were out for a walk on this beautiful fall morning when this old song from my childhood popped into my head:
“It’s a dead man’s party, who could ask for more? Everybody’s comin’ leave your body and soul at the door.”
I supposed some Halloween decoration somewhere had triggered it. Whatever the case, “Dead Man’s Party” continued to roll through the back of my mind as we talked about various struggles people are enduring in life.
Toward the end of our walk, we came to the biggest showcase in town. If they aren’t preparing for a haunted house, I’m not sure what they’re doing. Center stage stands a couple of skeletons that are bigger than any I’ve ever seen. Around the yard there are probably at least fifty others of various shapes, sizes, and species.
Throughout the month, more and more skeletons have donned their capes and hats and bowties. Spiderwebs hang between the live oaks, supported by the Spanish moss. A boat is wrecked with its long departed castaways. And now the song comes to the forefront of my mind, its haunting lyrics demanding to be considered.
Dead Man’s Party
Oingo Boingo ~ 1985
I’m all dressed up with nowhere to go
Walkin’ with a dead man over my shoulder
I’m all dressed up with nowhere to go
Walkin’ with a dead man over my shoulder
Waiting for an invitation to arrive
Goin’ to a party where no one’s still alive
Waiting for an invitation to arrive
Goin’ to a party where no one’s still alive
I was struck by lightning, walkin’ down the street
I was hit by something last night in my sleep
It’s a dead man’s party, who could ask for more?
Everybody’s comin’, leave your body at the door
Leave your body and soul at the door
Don’t run away, it’s only me
Only me
I’m all dressed up with nowhere to go
Walkin’ with a dead man, with a dead man
Ooh-ooh, waitin’ for an invitation to arrive
Ooh, walkin’ with a dead man, with a dead man
I got my best suit and my tie
With shiny silver dollar on either eye
I hear the chauffeur comin’ to my door
He says there’s room for maybe just one more
Hey, I was struck by lightning, walkin’ down the street
I was hit by something last night in my sleep
It’s a dead man’s party, who could ask for more?
Everybody’s comin’, leave your body at the door
Leave your body and soul at the door
Don’t run away, it’s only me
Don’t be afraid of what you can’t see
Don’t run away, it’s only me
Don’t be afraid of what you can’t see
It’s only me
This song has such a fantastic vibe and thrilling sense of nostalgia. But like many songs, beneath the score is a tortured expression of the opposite. The upbeat music masks a hopelessness that remains unanswered.
Who am I? Why am I here?
There is no joy at a dead man’s party if this is all there is. Death itself is nothing to celebrate. Outside of faith and hope of salvation, we have nothing to look forward to in death but terrifying darkness. And we all know it at our core.
People run into this darkness because they feel nothing, chasing ghosts and soulless bones because they think it will fill the void within. The irony is, it’s exactly what it promises. Nothingness. And like the song says, people don’t really want what they find there. They run toward the horror only to feel something. But they end up grasping elusive ghouls or worse — facing their own demons.
My prayer this October is for all of the hurting and broken people in the world and for all of those who are so wounded they no longer feel. Here is your invitation:
The Valley of Dry Bones
Isaiah
37 The hand of the Lord was on me, and he brought me out by the Spirit of the Lord and set me in the middle of a valley; it was full of bones. 2 He led me back and forth among them, and I saw a great many bones on the floor of the valley, bones that were very dry. 3 He asked me, “Son of man, can these bones live?”
I said, “Sovereign Lord, you alone know.”
4 Then he said to me, “Prophesy to these bones and say to them, ‘Dry bones, hear the word of the Lord! 5 This is what the Sovereign Lord says to these bones: I will make breath[a] enter you, and you will come to life. 6 I will attach tendons to you and make flesh come upon you and cover you with skin; I will put breath in you, and you will come to life. Then you will know that I am the Lord.’”
7 So I prophesied as I was commanded. And as I was prophesying, there was a noise, a rattling sound, and the bones came together, bone to bone. 8 I looked, and tendons and flesh appeared on them and skin covered them, but there was no breath in them.
9 Then he said to me, “Prophesy to the breath; prophesy, son of man, and say to it, ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: Come, breath, from the four winds and breathe into these slain, that they may live.’” 10 So I prophesied as he commanded me, and breath entered them; they came to life and stood up on their feet—a vast army.
11 Then he said to me: “Son of man, these bones are the people of Israel. They say, ‘Our bones are dried up and our hope is gone; we are cut off.’ 12 Therefore prophesy and say to them: ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: My people, I am going to open your graves and bring you up from them; I will bring you back to the land of Israel. 13 Then you, my people, will know that I am the Lord, when I open your graves and bring you up from them. 14 I will put my Spirit in you and you will live, and I will settle you in your own land. Then you will know that I the Lord have spoken, and I have done it, declares the Lord.’”
The Death of Jesus
Matthew 27
45 From noon until three in the afternoon darkness came over all the land. 46 About three in the afternoon Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eli, Eli,[c] lema sabachthani?” (which means “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”).[d]
47 When some of those standing there heard this, they said, “He’s calling Elijah.”
48 Immediately one of them ran and got a sponge. He filled it with wine vinegar, put it on a staff, and offered it to Jesus to drink. 49 The rest said, “Now leave him alone. Let’s see if Elijah comes to save him.”
50 And when Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, he gave up his spirit.
51 At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth shook, the rocks split 52 and the tombs broke open. The bodies of many holy people who had died were raised to life. 53 They came out of the tombs after Jesus’ resurrection and[e] went into the holy city and appeared to many people.
54 When the centurion and those with him who were guarding Jesus saw the earthquake and all that had happened, they were terrified, and exclaimed, “Surely he was the Son of God!”
Oh, you just knew I was going to love this…and I did!
Other than the fact that it’s a really cool song, for me it has always embodied the sense that Death is not something to be feared, but that there is some ‘new beginning',’ whether that’s a pleasant after-life or simply a continuing consciousness.
We used to do the big Hallowe’en displays when I lived in Encino (e.g., lots of animatronics, coffins with lids rising, fog machines, dancing ghosts, the works), but there aren’t a lot of kids around here who enjoy Hallowe’en (our neighborhood is … ahem … opposed to ‘occult teachings’), so we don’t do that anymore. But it was a blast! My brother and I still keep Esmeralda (our animatronic ghost that we built) hanging around in the garage.
Thank you for thinking of me!